Low battery? Where's your charger?

Where's my charger?
(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My phone battery keeps running down, it's really annoying, but I guess a symptom of our high-drain lives.  Smartphones do so much for us and I suppose this means they need a lot of energy to keep going.  They're not that different to human beings when you think about it...

Last weekend I blogged about saying yes to things and taking the opportunities that present themesleves, and ironically I've had a week that has put my theory to the test.  I've had an exciting week, full of oportunities.  Opportunities to say yes, and opportunities to say no...so, I said yes (of course), and although the sheer effort involved has left me shattered, I stand by my message from last week's blog that yes is best.  What it has meant however, is that as well as my phone battery, my mental and physical batteries were in a critically low state - if I were a smartphone I'd have been beeping out a warning on Friday afternoon! Here's why...
 
As well as being a lecturer (teaching is still the most important part of my job) I am lucky enough to have a number of other roles at my institution and to have my own business and other responsibilities outside work.  This is a 'portfolio career' that I love, and gives me the opportunity to experience lots of different challenges (I never could stand being stuck doing the same thing day in day out).  One of these roles is Director of Communications for Swansea Business School.  This is fantastic privilege and means I get to continue to be a marketing practitioner as well as an academic, and (hopefully) plays to my strengths and experience as a commercial marketer.  However, being 'out there' representing the School and engaging with stakeholders including the media is an important part of this role, and this means being in social environments on a regular basis, something that for an introvert like myself can be both challenging and draining.


I could say that this week has been one that, as a natural introvert, has been  pretty much my idea of hell.  I've been on the national news, organising events, meeting and greeting high-profile visitors, appearing in a video which had its first screening at launch event I attended, and doing all sorts of other 'out there' things.  In consequence, I have found myself feeling somewhat overexposed.  Don't get me wrong, although I find this work challenging in many ways, I love it in others and recognise how important a part of my job, and what a great opportunity it is.

Now, I'm sure there are some people who see me doing that kind of thing at work who will think it's something I find easy (at least I hope I'm convincing enough for that!), but in reality it all goes directly against my natural social preference (and maybe that's just part of why I enjoy the challenge).  Frankly, I'd rather be writing, reading a book or speaking to someone one-to-one than networking in a large group, but I've developed strategies that mean I can manage it for a time, although I do find that it leeches away my energy.

Introversion and extroversion are interesting concepts, and although there are other ways of interpreting them or using these terms, I like the Jungian view which was further developed by Myers-Briggs in the MBTI personality type indicator that suggests those who have an extrovert preference are energised by social environments and will actively seek out groups with which they need to interact to gain more energy.  Introverts on the other hand find social engagement a drain on their energy - they may enjoy it in some ways and are very capable of engaging in social interaction, but it saps their energy rather than charging it up.  So, when they've had a great deal of social interaction they often need some quiet time away from it all to recharge.  That's what I've needed this weekend, just a little time away from the people and the cameras and the ringing phones to recharge ready for the week ahead.  I had just about hit the 'low battery' mark, and whereas my phone beeps at me to tell me my batteries are low, I have had to learn the signs and clues my body and brain give me to let me know when this is happening to me.


For my phone, I keep spare batteries and a charger with me in my bag and in the car, but I have also grown used to keeping some of the things that help me energise myself around me and available for those times when I need them, whether that be access to quiet space, or just the ability to jump in the car and drive.

Whether you're an introvert who needs quiet time or an extrovert who needs to go out and socialise to re-energise, recognising the signs of a low battery in yourself and knowing how to deal with it before you run out completely is an important factor in our busy lives.  So, my questions for you to ask yourself today are - can you recognise your own low battery signal and what have you got in the bag as your equivalent of the spare battery, or the charger?  If you can't answer...maybe it's time to take a look at your instruction manual and work out how to plug yourself in...

Learning to say 'yes'

"Do what we say and you WILL become Beyonce...honest" (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I don't buy magazines; magazines for women that is. Occasionally, however, I find myself at someone else's house, or in waiting room or something, and there they are all glossy and smiley with bright colours and 'superwoman' guides to being 'the best human being in the world...ever!' and I can't help but have a flick through.

This superficial glossy veneer is part of the reason I'm not a fan of them, but also, I recognise, part of their unique allure.  They give with one hand and take with the other...tell us we can have it all, then explain how to hold back.  'How to save for a rainy day' next to an editorial about £800 handbags...how to lose half a stone in three days two pages before a recipe for devil's food cake.  They love to tease and tantalise...but most of all they love to sell product.  That's the real game we buy into when we buy a magazine.  What we're really buying is a catalogue, a display of the things we need to have a perfect life.

...because looking great naked is the most important thing in the world to your feeble female brain... (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I could go on here...and another day I'm sure I'll write another post (rant) on deconstructing the women's magazine industry...but the real subject of this blog is one particular kind of article that really annoys me.  This is the 'just say no' article; the piece written to make you feel as though your busy, perhaps hugely fulfilling, but busy life is too much for you and that you should start refusing to do things (presumably so you can spend more time shopping for expensive face creams).  The chances are there are times when you do feel pretty overloaded and as though everyone wants a piece of you, but saying no is, for me anyway, by far the worse decision than saying 'yes' and having a go at something.

My default setting has always been 'yes'.  Saying no does not come easily to me.  If you are presented with an opportunity I say see it, take it, try it, and be prepared for death or glory.  It may not work out, but at least you gave it a go, eh?  You'll never reach your old age wondering what might have been.

The world is full of people who have learned to say no to things, learned not to take risks, learned not to see the opportunities that lie in every offer, every chance meeting.  We've learned to fear challenges instead of facing up to them. If you believe the magazines, saying no is the strong person's route, and saying yes is a sign of being downtrodden and put-upon,  but I'd argue that saying yes, on your own terms, is the sign of someone truly free.

Taking a risk every now and then is good for the soul - take it from someone who knows - I've taken more risks in my life than many and don't regret a single one, no matter how much trouble they've brought. So, don't believe the magazines. They want you to limit yourself; to take the easy route and self-medicate through retail therapy.

If you want a perfect life you're out of luck - it doesn't exist - but a happy life does, and a happy life for me is a fulfiling life full of challenge and opportunity.  A life where 'yes' is always the first choice.

Push on...

Tiger in your Tank? Life lessons we can learn from driver behaviour...

You could just stay at home...or walk?
(Image credit: Getty Images via @daylife)

Did you top-up your fuel tank this week in readiness for the apocalypse?  Or at least in readiness for those pesky people, whom we curse for holding us up on the roads with their slowly driven tankers, but on whom we are also shockingly dependent, having the temerity to demand decent pay and conditions for their trouble, taking a stand (or a hydraulic, super-cushioned seat at least) against 'the man' who it seems is making all the money while they struggle on...

Yes, so did I.  (But at 6am when the roads were clear and there were no queues or fuss...just preparing my moral high ground ;))).

In all honesty, I feel exactly the same about this as many people - the concern that you won't be able to continue running your life in the ways you are used to because you may not be able to get what you need drives anxiety and fear, but I also recognise that this sort of situation can bring out the very worst in us (and let's be fair and say perhaps the best too) as social actors. When millions of people all feel the same anxiety and fear at the same time and directed at the same service area, they change from their normal ways of doing things - when people are pushed their personalities may shift into their 'stressed' self and we started to see unusual behaviours occur.

So, let's take a look at what really happened last week in terms of the 'panic buying' of fuel...

If you've not seen Kevin Allocca's TED talk about what makes a a YouTube video go viral, you'll know that there is usually a key influencer who creates the spark - sometimes way after the event in question has taken place, but it's crucially their network of influence that matters in terms of the viral spread of the video.  In this case our influencer happened to be a cabinet minister who recklessly lit the blue touch paper and retired, leaving the national media only too happy to fan the flames of panic.  What a payday story for them...

Our reactions as consumers, however, is what really fascinates me here.  Particularly the sudden shift from order to chaos, the behaviours this evinces in us, and how this manifests at macro and micro levels.  So, we have our normal ways of doing things - stopping off for petrol, maybe queueing behind one or two cars at a busy time, but a fairly relaxed and simple operation.  Suddenly, every petrol station we see has cars queueing off the forecourts - and this sends something of a primal signal to us.  They must know something I don't, they'll get there before me, if I don't join them I might miss out.  This is the wonderfully attractive power of crowds.

To me, it seems that these thoughts are driven by some of the uglier aspects of human nature - by our selfishness, our 'me-first' or 'survival - instinct' that overrides our sense of society and the needs of others; and yet I saw many seemingly orderly queues this week, with drivers sensibly queueing away from areas where they could block roads and walkways, and showing no aggressive tendencies - is this a sign of our ability to self-organise based on the norms and rules we set as a society?  Or is this simply a sign of rational behaviour?  In other places, however, there were tales of aggression and anger at petrol stations, and of reckless queueing onto main roads (in one case blocking the entrance to an ambulance station) and pedestrian areas.

Lanes merge ahead (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The roads, and driver behaviour, are a great way to measure our overall relationships to society and each other in my view, as not only are they the spaces in which we interact with many many strangers on a day-to-day basis, but we also do so inside the protective cocoon of our vehicles, which means we don't really have to engage with others as people.  This enables us to switch off some of the empathy we might feel if we were face-to-face with a human being (incidentally the Internet is another comparable space where we have this protective 'bubble' of distance and where aggressive behaviour often ensues).  Driving also allows us considerable autonomy in terms of the ways we do things.  So, we have the capacity to annoy each other by driving in slightly different ways.

Let me give you an example (one that bugs me...) - merging traffic.  When two lanes of traffic need to merge, and you start to see those dead-end signs...800 yards....600 yards...400 yards...200 yards...when do you get into the single open lane?  As early as possible? Or do you stay in your lane until the merge point?  Or are you one of those angry, self-styled heroes who decides to block the second lane so no-one else can use it?  People become highly defensive and aggressive in terms of their position on the road in these situations...and yet the science is pretty clear...we should all use all of the road available right up to the merge point, where a turn-taking merging of the lanes should take place.  This is the most efficient use of the road space...(if you don't believe me watch this video) but so many people just do not see it...the idea that someone might get ahead of them in the queue seems to switch off their logic.

Selfishness can be extremely powerful, and in this case, rather than aggressive or offensive behaviour, what I feel has driven much of this is a need to defend oneself against an increasingly threatening world.  This is a world where our comfortable, convenient lifestyle does us no favours.  We become incredibly attached to our material positions and our narrow social worlds, putting vast amounts of our energies into maintaining them, but do we ever reflect on whether we actually need them.  If the fuel ran out tomorrow what would you do?  Could you live without it?  Of course you could - you are perfectly capable of living a simpler life - less dependent on social systems and on goods and services that you use to maintain your sense of identity and ego.  You just haven't tried it.

So here's a thought... have a go at just letting go of your grip on 'stuff' and your 'routine' for a little while.  Go somewhere wild...walk, live, sleep.   There are wild places tucked away even in the most urban of environments, so your present location is no excuse. 

Crowds are great - they can solve problems, get things done quickly and make a huge difference in the world, making us feel part of something in  the process.  But independent thought, even when in a crowd, is something you should never give up.  So don't succumb to the crowd mentality, make your choices about when to participate and when to let them get on with it.

What's most important though, is to stop judging yourself against others.  What they're doing isn't necessarily what you need to do.  Just because they queue doesn't mean queuing will make things better for you.  Just because they have an amazing house, car, lifestyle, it doesn't mean you need that too.  As my grandfather always said...you can't take it with you...  So why not try forgeting the aggression, the oneupmanship and the defensiveness for a while and learn to live with a bit less stuff and you might just end up living with a bit less stress too... 

A Nation Under Sedation: Are we soaking in the warm bath of mediocrity?

Morgan says, 'Get up, Move Faster' (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This week I had the privilege of being an invited guest at a Wales Management Council debate on whether Wales as a nation lacks ambition, whether the country as a whole is hungry enough for success. 

This question, set by fellow guest Dr Paul Thomas whom many of you will know from his TV series ‘The Business Doctor’, caused, as I’m sure you can imagine a passionate and emotive discussion around the table.  Clearly there is passion in Wales, particularly amongst business leaders and educators it would seem, but what about in the wider populous?  Can we really say that a whole nation lacks ambition without sinking into national cultural stereotyping?  And if we can, what might be the reasons for this mediocrity complex?

That's perhaps a set of questions for another day, as it’s not the purpose of this post to focus on Wales per se.  That's because I believe this is as much a personal issue as a national one, so rather I want to consider what might make individuals and groups be willing to settle for a Status Quo that is not moving them forward in any way.  Why would we be settling for a life of routine comforts instead of looking towards a future that might be brighter in many ways?

This is where the Freudian psychology might come in…Freud’s Pleasure Principle suggests that it is human nature to move away from pain and towards pleasure.  This is not a simple dichotomy, however, as some pleasure is gained through pain...through hard work, through struggle and suffering (those of you who are working towards a major life-goal, a PhD, bringing up children, setting up a business, will know what I mean here).

But what if there is no real pain in our life?  What if it's all pretty comfortable as it is?  What if we know that the safety net of the state will always pick us up if we fall over, and what if moving towards something different, towards a different set of life goals, towards a successful, fulfilling future, actually requires us to go through some of that pain to get there?  This is where inertia sets in.  We settle for the comfort of mediocrity, the restful state, and it seems to me this warm bath of mediocrity is an easy place to be, and for many an easy place to stay.  It's like living under sedation.  

But what kind of life is that?  Is it really so great to stay in your green and pleasant land when there is suffering in the world that you could be helping people out of, where there are challenges and opportunities to make the world a better place - where you can contribute?  What a shame it would be if you died tomorrow and your only contribution to society had been in the form of taxes and putting your small change in a charity box.

One of my favourite phrases in life is ’push on’ – I use it in my self-talk when I know there is pain ahead but it will be worth it.  When I’m walking long distance and we’re nearly at our goal destination for the day, I'll often say ‘let’s push on’ to the next check point – so we’re ahead of ourselves for the next day.  This is about attitude – it is, quite literally, about ‘going the extra mile’.  If you consistently go the extra mile, you can consistently achieve more than you, or those around you, thought possible.  And, if you get exhausted, if you fall down, if you fail…you just take a moment and then you get up and push on again.  

Another of my favourite phrases  is from the movie Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves (yes I know).  In the film, when Robin is knocked down in a fight he asks his friend Azeem (Morgan Freeman) for some advice. Azeem simply says ‘get up; move faster’, and this is what I say to myself whenever I fall down or fail at something.  Just pick yourself up and do it better next time.  We can all do this if we're willing to go through a little short term pain in order to achieve the rewards we dream of, but so many people don't...and if you're one of those who don't...maybe it might be worth jumping in a cold shower for a minute and asking yourself why?

And as for Wales as a nation, I know there are passionate people here, people who want to ‘push on’ just as I do, but there are also a lot of people for whom the Status quo is just too comfortable.  As a nation, perhaps we also need to get out of that warm bath of mediocrity and give ourselves a blast of cold water to get us moving again; we need to listen to Azeem and pick ourselves up and get on with it, quite simply, we need to ‘get up; move faster’.

The Wales Management Council is seeking to raise the voices of business and educators in challenging government to create a Wales that is hungry for success; a Wales that has passion beyond the cultural and sporting fields, that has passion in business too – in short, a Wales that has its ‘hwyl’ back. Being a small nation doesn't mean we have to think small... and so the Council is developing a strategy to engage government and policy-makers on this vision and ambition for excellence in Wales – you can discuss and support the campaign by joining the debate in their LinkedIn group or by following them on Twitter @walesmanagement.

 

Don't quota me...

Theresa May - A positive...and a negative...
does that make her neutral?
Image via Wikipedia

This week we had the pleasure of welcoming a guest speaker from the organisation 'Chwarae Teg' or 'Fair Play' to Swansea Business School for a session on gender equality (or inequality) in business.  Chwarae Teg is an organisation that supports the economic development of women here in Wales, and I can imagine that those of you who are regular readers of this blogs will probably be able to predict that the very fact that this organisation exists annoys the hell out of me...

It probably annoys the hell out of them too.

I hope it does.

Our speaker, Ellie Harwood, was excellent; knowledgeable and balanced, with some excruciating examples of ignorance to share, and I was thoroughly impressed with way Chwarae Teg go about what they do, but I can't help feeling sad that they are seen as necessary.

This session was timely, as you may have seen in the news this week the reporting of the results of the Davies Review of women on boards.  Of course, one might find it ironic that a middle-aged, upper-classed, white male was asked to undertake the review...but one can only assume he was the best candidate for the job...is that right Dave?

As an aside...I find it hilarious that throughout the report Lord Davies himself refers to 'Chairmen' as the people who have to solve the problems.  Old habits run deep eh?

To add to the general farcical nature of the whole review, Theresa May gave a rather confused speech at the launch, which for me, highlighted many of the complexities here.  On her own behalf she championed the cause against so-called positive action, saying she didn't want to to be done any favours because of her gender and wanted to make it on her own merits, but at the same time she was supporting the recommendations of the report which, although it does not directly recommend government sponsored positive discrimination, simply seems to pass the buck to businesses (over to you Chairmen!) by recommending target levels that ought to be achieved.  I have two words on this - cop out.

Another disappointment in the reporting of the results of the review was the BBC's choice to angle the story on the (undisputable but deeply misleading fact) that the number of women on boards is at unprecedented levels.  I have to say I feel this is rather lazy journalism...of course any tiny increase is going to result in 'unprecedented levels', but this is not the story here.  The story is that there's inequality and nobody is dealing with the root causes.

So what is the root cause?  Simple. The issue we all know is there already, and the thing that our speaker from Chwarae Teg highlighted so eloquently this week.  Endemic enculturation and acculturation of gender stereotyping from a very early age.  Education is where we need to start...and not just the education of our children, but education throughout life.  Chwarae Teg are about to start piloting programmes in schools to break down gender stereotyping from a very early age, and I think this is excellent, but we need to do more...and those of us involved in education at University level or in organisational training and development have a role to play here too. But it's not simply about a half day training course on why we're all equal...it's about a culture change...and for that we need role models.  We don't, however, need to parachute these role models onto boards to meet false quotas...we simply have to start with ourselves.  Whether you're a man or a woman you can be a role model on this, just by thinking about the language you use and reflecting on the way you treat people in your workplace.

So, please don't quota me or any other woman onto a board - don't insult me by patronising me in this way.  Just appoint me on the basis of my ability to do a fantastic job, or don't appointment me at all.

My column in the business section of the South Wales Evening Post also addresses this issue this month (out Monday if you're interested) :)

What is it all for? This...

Smiley SMUDGE Enterprise 2012 participants

Last week I had one of the busiest weeks I've ever had in this job - and one of the most satisfying.  It was industry week at the business school and we hosted our Annual St. David's Day lecture (with the wonderful, inspirational, Professor Laura McAllister) and also our 3 day SMUDGE Enterprise bootcamp  - both of which I was engaged in organising and running.

Strangely enough, I was also asked by several people this week what drives me, and why I do this job.  Maybe because they could see me running around like a mad thing trying to get everything done in the (frankly measly allocation of) 24hrs in each day, who knows?  But the question was asked, and this forced me to reflect.  Why do I do this job, when it takes so much out of me?  When I get up at 5am, get to my desk by 7am, work all day without pause until late...go home, work some more, sleep a little and repeat to fade. 

So, for what it's worth, here are my reasons...how do they compare to your reasons for doing your job?

Firstly, I know what it's like to be the underdog - to be the one who feels like an alien in a world of gods and goddesses.  I know what it's like to be surrounded by the privileged and expectant - to be taken advantage of, to be the up-start, Camus's outsider, Kafka's cockroach, Radiohead's Creep.

I also know what it's like to find that you don't have the right connections, the right knowledge, the right look, the right reference points and have to catch up or get around the system despite the standing start.

Finally, I know what it's like to lose everything and have to start from scratch with just a suitcase and new place.

So, for me to see those students who may seem disengaged, marginalised, lacking confidence, frustrated, damaged, angry (the list could go on) throwing themselves into something, buzzing about their ideas, taking part, showing that they can do it and surprising themselves, is such an amazing feeling.  I've had the great privilege of seeing that this week, and I can't keep the smile off my face as a result.

So, I find myself working away here this weekend, but I don't mind, because I know that some good happened this week, and I helped in some small way.  These are my reasons - just in case you're asking...

If you want to see what I'm talking about...take a quick peek at the SMUDGE Enterprise 2012 live blog.

Or the Twitter feed: www.twitter.com/SMUDGE_Ent

Public Lives, Public Deaths: What will your online legacy be?

Mourning for Princess Diana centred around the royal palaces.
(Photo credit: betsythedevine)

My first instinct, on hearing that Whitney Houston’s funeral would be webcast live around the world was one of mild nausea.   How could that be appropriate? Something about it was so, well, cheap.

I’ve thought about it though, and I’ve changed my mind.  Hers was a very public life, and because it reached so far I can see that it makes sense that there should be the opportunity for those who were in some way engaged with it to share in the grief of those closest to her.  After all, we all have the choice to watch, or not watch.

I'm reminded of the approach to mourning when Princess Diana died in 1997.   Millions of people grieved across the nation, many travelling hundreds of miles to visit memorial sites.  Back then, Internet technologies were developing, but were certainly not the mainstream and the infrastructure of social networks was certainly not there to facilitate this activity in the way it is today.  What would have happened today?  Well, the more recent deaths of celebrities like Whitney Houston, Amy Winehouse, and Michael Jackson may provide some insight. 

Whereas a funeral and obituary in a newspaper were the standard approaches in the past, the Internet has provided us with seemingly infinite opportunities to share grief and create memorials to the dead; and it’s commonplace already, of course, with memorial pages on Facebook replacing the laying of flowers at a graveside or accident site, enabling those who can’t physically ‘be there’ to contribute digitally.

What we seem to be experiencing is a transition, a developing online culture of mourning, and this isn’t just an issue for celebrities.  As our lives become increasingly public, through the way we publish and share information online, ordinary people like you and I need to consider our digital legacies just as much as celebrities do.

With this cultural shift comes an important set of questions for our society.  How should digital publications be dealt with after death? Should every tweet, wall post, blog entry exist for all time, as a perpetual memorial?  Should usernames and accounts be ‘recycled’ or returned to prevent fraudulent use?  Should we all create a ‘digital will’? How can we manage this in the future?  Will the Internet become clogged up like an overfull graveyard with dead people’s accounts?  

A macabre set of questions I know, but a real issue, and one we can’t ignore.  We seem to see our digital lives as ‘throwaway’ because we can’t see, touch, feel, or put them on a shelf like a book; but they are just as important socially and culturally.  As our libraries struggle to keep up with the recording and management of digital sources (how many of us have backed up early versions of web sites we owned, and how useful would these be to researchers in the future?), this is something I believe anyone who is publishing on the web should at very least give a little thought to.

So, my questions for you are – what would happen to your online legacy if you died?  What would you like to happen?  Who would be able to access your accounts?  What should be kept, where and how?  I know you don’t want to think about it, but have a care for your family – the people who would have to deal with this issue for you – and while you’re at it, you might want to think about those generations who, in a century or two, might be researching their family tree.  

What do you want them to find?